Someone recently told me to make sure I have thick skin, so that I can deal with fallout that is almost certain to happen. This person paused for a moment and then continued, “You’ll be fine. You’re good with rolling with the craziness around here.” I think things are about to get a bit tenuous for a bit at work, but it will all be okay. There’s a transition that needs to happen, that is well overdue to occur, and I think it’s finally going to happen soon. It’s not a bad thing or anything like that, it’s just something that has been handled less than awesomely, and my patience is waning.
I am not sure at what point in my life I became someone with a thick skin. Kind of like I am not sure when I became a person who makes her bed every morning. And I am not sure when I became someone who sleeps better when she says goodnight to certain people. Or when it was that I became a morning person. In a funny little way, behaviors become habit, become a part of us. We change, we grow, we adapt to our surroundings. We evolve.
Sometimes I wish I could make things easier for the people who are giving me a hard time. It’s something I have been thinking about a lot lately. I think that even more than being thick-skinned about this weird work situation, I need to figure out a way to create solutions to the problems (real and imaginary, because there are totally both of those going on here). I think I ruffled a few feathers in the past week, as my patience has begun to falter, but I think, vague and boring as this post is, that I can turn this around into something positive that will change things for everyone for the better. At least, that is what I am going to try to accomplish. Hopefully not until after winter break, though, because there’s only 3 more work days til I am free for two solid workweeks.
It isn’t often that I worry about work at home. This didn’t use to be the case. I used to get so caught up in it that I would take such stupid emotional work baggage home with me. I am not sure how that happened, how I was that person, but I know I learned to shake it off when I finally got a job that wasn’t soul-suckingly horrible. Nothing changed my life for the better like the last time I got laid off. Sometimes I think about what a beautiful day that was, not just because it was an oddly warm sunshiny November day, but because it was so momentous. Everything since that point, for the most part, has been about me heading in more positive and awesome directions. So now, even though I am thinking a little bit about work tonight, and I think I had a little seed of worry in my gut over it, I feel better now that I’ve tapped out some words about it. That act helped to remind me that I can turn the negativity that has been happening lately around simply by how I react to it.